Yesterday I was tapping away at the keyboard, and I glanced out the window, which everyone knows is an essential part of the writing/brainstorming process. I saw a mommy deer walking past the driveway, followed by two baby deer. The baby deer were adorable, as you would expect, and they were actually frolicking, obviously happy to be outside on such a nice day and getting to play.
I jumped up to get my camera. I had recently charged the battery so I not only knew where the camera was, but that it was good to go.
By the time I got it, though, the deer had moved far enough away that I couldn't get their picture through the window. I decided to go outside, around the house, and take a picture that way.
I guess my stealthy movements weren't all that stealthy, because as soon as I came into view, the mom's head came up and she stared at me. If anybody had that "deer in the headlights" look, it was ME. Even though I was easily 50 feet away, I could see she considered me a bit of a threat.
I held up my camera and managed one click. I have no idea what I took a picture of though, because all of a sudden I noticed Mommie Deerest's lips were moving. Until then I'd never realized deer had lips that could move.
Clearly she was muttering something under her breath. It wasn't likely she was admiring my summer writing ensemble, or my budding wildlife photography skills.
That's when I realized I had two other skills that were more important in that moment: 1) surviving, and 2) writing about the encounter, assuming she didn't run faster than I did and took a chomp out of me first.
I raced back around the house, hoping she didn't feel the urge to jump over the stone fence, which I knew she could do as easily as I lift my coffee cup. Once I was safely inside my writer's lair, she and her babies were gone, probably off to the next stop on their neighborhood tour. I counted my increased heart rate as my daily exercise and then, as any writer would, I began to ponder what she was saying to her babies when I saw her lips moving in such a menacing fashion.
I'm guessing it was this: "Hey, kids. Wanna see a human turn into a blur?"