First Gifts Blog Hop

I can't remember the first gift I got from a certain ex-boyfriend, but I can describe the most memorable one.

This man was always late.  He made lateness a type of performance art.  When we were invited to dinner at a friend's house, I told him we had to be there an hour BEFORE we were supposed to arrive—so that we could arrive close to the ACTUAL time.   If he could have time travelled, I have no doubt he would have landed in 1776 when he was shooting for 1492.

The funny part?   He hated waiting. 

Okay, it's funny to me, since I spent way too much time waiting for him.  One day, to kill time, I picked up a notepad and pen and started writing stories.  After that, it didn't seem to matter that I was waiting for him to show up, or get ready, or whatever.

I wasn't really waiting anymore.

So there I was—yup, you guessed it—waiting for him to show up so we could do whatever we had planned.  I was flouncing around my apartment, getting more steamed, and irate, and every thesaurus variation of angry I could possibly experience.  (All of this came in handy for writing scenes in later books, which just goes to show you, nothing in a writer's life is ever wasted.)

At last, there was a knock on my door.  I yanked it open, glaring with such intensity I should have melted the skin from. . .the back of his head?  He wasn't even LOOKING at me!  He was turned away, gazing at the yard, his posture the same unconcerned way it always was.  I can't remember for sure, but I'm confident I ranted and raved—even knowing he was as impervious to that as he was to being on time.

When he finally turned around, he looked down at his feet, not at me.  What a beautiful demonstration of remorse, and regret.  He was truly repentant. . .only contrition doesn't last quite THAT long.

I looked down too.  There was a present sitting there. 

On one hand I was thrilled, the childlike side of me jumping up and down, squealing, "A present?  For me?"  But my still-angry other hand was sneering, "A present?  For me?"

It was a lovely jewelry box, which I still use, covered in a rich Victorian floral fabric.  Still, it wasn't my birthday, and "National Peace Offering Day" was not listed on my calendar anywhere. 

"Is this supposed to keep me from being mad?" 

I heard a laugh, followed by, "I knew I wouldn't be able to fool you."

We lasted a few more years, longer than we should have, because I was young, and addicted to the belief that he would change, if given enough time.  However, I prefer to think I used that time to develop my writing craft, as well as much-needed patience for the glacial pace of the publishing world. 

As it turns out, these ended up being even better gifts than the peace offering, all thanks to this maddening man with no regard for time.

 

Comments

[Maureen]

In my house, we call that Filipino time. His whole family does it. It took decades, but I trained him out of it. However, we still wait for his mom, and both brothers at any opportunity they have.

Yup. Filipino time!

;-)

[Donna Cummings]

Maureen, you're lucky you got to train your husband out of it! LOL My training efforts were for naught. So it's good I got "writing time" out of it all. :)

[Liz Fichera]

LOVE the story! And I can see your boyfriend in my mind--maybe it's because I dated a guy like him long ago. But never got a lovely jewelry box out of the deal! You must do a follow-up "Where is He Now?" story--I'm intrigued. :-)

Thanks so much for joining the Blog Hop this weekend, Donna! xo

[Donna Cummings]

Liz, you got to date one too? LOL Makes you wish we had all that "waiting time" back, doesn't it?

I haven't had any contact with him for years, so if I did a "Where Is He Now?" story, it would be complete fiction. LOL (You KNOW I would play a different part though!)

[Melissa]

Great story! Yes, I can relate too. Oh, all that waiting time! I could definitely write that into a story though. In fact, I think that fits my heroine of my WIP. I think. I've left her waiting to finish her story for such a long time I can't really say for sure! LOL

[Donna Cummings]

Melissa, your poor heroine! She could get together with a few of mine. I've started their stories and then had to set them aside for one reason or another. It's a writing triage around here. LOL Which story needs to be told first?

[Eleri Stone]

My husband is completely the opposite of this. It drives him crazy if he thinks he might be late!

[Shirley Wells]

Oh, the waiting time. At least you got a lovely gift out of it *and* you got to hone your craft. :)
I wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes with him. I have to be everywhere hours too early and that drives everyone in the family mad.

[Donna Cummings]

Eleri, I *try* to be on time, but I have to work hard at it. My sister once got me a license plate holder that said, "Always late, but worth the wait". LOL I just keep it to "fashionably late" tho.

[Donna Cummings]

Shirley, things do seem to work out the way they're supposed to, don't they? LOL I'm glad I learned how to use that waiting time in a productive fashion. I think I would go mad, though, if I had to be someplace TOO early--I'd have to bring my notepad there as well!

[Rachel Firasek]

Great post. He did give you the best GIFT. Patience. We so need it in this world.

[Donna Cummings]

I agree, Rachel -- it's a gift that we need to use on a daily basis!

[Twimom227]

Thanks for sharing... It does seem like you received several gifts from that relationship - ones that are more valuable than a jewelry box. Unfortunately, you probably didn't see them as gifts at the time!

[Donna Cummings]

Twimom, you're exactly right -- I didn't realize until much later what great gifts I'd been given. Isn't that always the case? LOL

Thanks for stopping by for my very first blog hop. :)

[Tina]

Ah, what truth -- nothing in a writer's life is every wasted. If you decide to write that "where is he now?" fiction, I think you'd have a cool story.

Thanks for being in the blog hop!

[Joanna St. James]

yay for exes they are always good for something.

[Donna Cummings]

Tina, that's part of the fun of being a writer--we can use everything around us (even if people don't want us to! LOL)

And I've enjoyed being in the blog hop--my first one!

[Donna Cummings]

LOL, Joanna--that's my philosophy too. :)

[Talina Perkins]

Ah, you are right, nothing is ever wasted in a writer's life. Thank you for sharing your story. I have really enjoyed reading all the stories on teh blog hop!

[Donna Cummings]

Talina, it's amazing how much info we have all around us, isn't it? :) I've enjoyed the blog hop too--all kinds of great stories I might have missed otherwise!

[Mary Montague Sikes - Monti]

It's hard to wait but you learned to use your time well. Is the jewelry box a positive or negative reminder of that time?

Monti
NotesAlongTheWay

[Donna Cummings]

Monti, no negative reminders. :) It actually makes me chuckle when I see the jewelry box on my dresser now. I EARNED it. LOL

[Heather]

Your two reactions are so true. A gift? I love gifts! Hey, you can't buy me off that easy!
Thanks for sharing.

[Donna Cummings]

Heather, that was exactly it! LOL So I got mad, and I got a present. Can't beat that!

[Nicki Elson]

Haha, he gave you a gift he wasn't even aware of. Unless THAT was what he was trying to do---give you extra time to to hone your craft...you're not buying it? Nah, me neither.

[Donna Cummings]

LOL, Nicki -- it sounded good though! I almost went for it!