Dare To Be A High Maintenance Writer

Dupioni silk. 

Gardenia blossoms. 

Thoroughbred racehorses.

These are just a few of the things that could be labeled “high maintenance”. But I think we’d all agree the care and attention required to maintain these exquisite items is definitely worth it.

Now it’s time to put ourselves in that category.

Look how much we accomplish in our lives when we are wiped out, knackered, face planted against the pillow, dog-tired. Yet we keep going, putting that slacker drum-pounding pink bunny to shame. Despite our constant efforts to hack away at the day-to-day chores, there’s ten times more on the list the following day. And that’s not counting the revising or daily word count we hope to get done.

Imagine if YOU were at the top of the daily To Do list. 

Everything, and everybody, will take your time and energy if you don’t take it for yourself. If you let everyone else have it, there’s nothing left when you try to write. And then you feel guilty for not wanting to write, or you tell yourself your writing is worse than crap, all because you’re attempting it after being drained by fourteen hundred everyday obligations.

How much kick-ass writing could you produce if it were your highest priority every single day? If YOU were the highest priority every day?

“You’re so high maintenance” is code for “you are fussy, entitled, self-absorbed, and WAY too devoted to satisfying your needs, generally at the expense of everyone else”. It’s synonymous with “Diva”, another word that has gone from complimentary (“leading lady”) to derogatory (“pain-in-the-ass”) in a very short time.

I’m not suggesting you ruthlessly flatten everyone else to fulfill your wants and needs. Not at all. But why shouldn’t you be all that you can be?

Why can’t you be the baked potato with all the extras? 

Why aren’t you considered the luxury sedan with the rich Corinthian leather seats?

Why shouldn’t you be first in line to get off the plane once it’s safely arrived at the gate?

I already know what you’re going to say about all the non-writing stuff that needs to be done every day: If I don’t do it, it won’t get done. 

You’re right, so I won’t even try to argue that point. However, I suspect the folks in your sphere--whether it’s work or school or family–-have become accustomed to you getting it all done, and they have no real motivation to change that scenario. So yes, if you want things to get done, you have to do it.

But you know what? The exact same thing can be said about your writing. If YOU don’t do it, it won’t get done. Nobody else can write the stories you write. Other people can fold the laundry, throw something in the microwave, toss Rover some of his favorite doggie treats. And they should be happy to do that. 

Because nobody else can write the stories you write.

I’m not promoting an arrogant or egotistical manifesto here. It’s simply acknowledging the desire to be more than a drone, a minion, a prototype first-generation robotic device. If those were enough, you wouldn’t dream up wonderful stories filled with pirates, and Kraken, and assassins, and hotties. Those imaginative, fantastical, romantic tales need to be written. Yet it’s difficult, sometimes next to impossible, when writing is last on the list, when energy levels are dim or non-existent.

I know it sounds like I’m being subversive. (I am.) I know it sounds like this will upset the daily routine. (Hopefully.) I know your friends and family aren't gonna buy me a birthday present now. (Dang.)

Still, it’s worth it. I don’t want to miss out on the breathtaking stories that are put aside because daily chores and mundane tasks rob your creative spirit. 

I’m asking that you dare to be high maintenance. 

Put yourself first, so that your books and your writing have the freshest, most inspired part of you, not the leftovers. 

So, what can you do to be High Maintenance? Does the thought of it make you uncomfortable? Or does it secretly thrill you? How do you plan to put your writing first today?

This was a post I originally did last year at Romance Writer's Revenge.

Comments

[JennW]

I like this post a lot! I do put my writing first often, after family of course, but before other things, like social life, lol and cleaning and working out. It also depends how entwined I am in a project how much it takes over. Sometimes I'm so into it, I barely even tweet. (this is rare though, ha!)

[SG Redling]

You had me at potato! I've come to learn that so many of those "musts" on my lists are really "I wish you would's" from people in my life who prefer to have me do the heavy lifting. I'm in the midst of a (self-imposed) 30 day writing challenge and, when push comes to shove, a whole lotta "musts" have become "Why don't you...?" So far the world has not stopped spinning.
Can we go back to the potato?

[Donna Cummings]

Thanks, Jenn. :) I love that feeling when a project takes over, and next thing I know, it's a completely different time of year. LOL I like to have Twitter open so I can take a little mental breather and see what everyone else is doing--okay, okay, to make sure they're not having too much fun!

[Donna Cummings]

SG, I'm such a potato gal too. In fact, I wanted to find a better pic of one with all the trimmings, but that was the best I could do (I'll fix it in revisions. LOL)

Excellent point about the "I wish you would's". It seems people get used to certain ways of things being done -- especially by OTHER people! So kudos to you for the writing challenge. What a great way to make sure writing gets done first.

So that you have plenty of time for potatoes. :)

[Sabrina]

I'm a writing comes last girl right now and I hate it. Thanks for the reminder that I need to be more selfish. :)

[Donna Cummings]

Sabrina, I think that's the tricky part -- we feel like we're being selfish, but we're not. We're doing something that is important to us, like everyone else seems to do. :)

But I know what it's like when work things come first. Sometimes you have to be creative--one of my favorite scenes came to mind while I was doing some mindless paperwork. LOL Writing is very subversive sometimes!

[Melissa]

I often seem to be on a time delay for putting me/my writing at the top of the to-do list. Since I've been insane enough to take a summer physics class, writing is out. The energy just isn't there. However, I still read the word problems and wonder, for instance...if a child in a boat throws a 6.40-kg package out horizontally at a speed of blah, blah, blah...then the burning questions are, of course, why the heck is the child in the boat and what is in the package? LOL Of course, this is all irrelevant to figuring out the speed of the boat (don't really care and part of the "blah, blah blah" info), but it makes for an interesting writing prompt, don't you think? :) But *sigh* I have to put those burning "irrelevant" questions aside for now, which is really driving me nuts. LOL So I guess -- oddly -- I'm struggling NOT to put writing first. LOL

[Donna Cummings]

Melissa, I nearly swooned just READING the word "physics". I can't imagine having to LEARN it, every day, in the summer. Eeek.

It sounds, though, like your writerly brain is in the forefront, so even if you don't have the energy to get the words onto paper, you're churning up great story ideas. (Yeah, why IS that child in the boat?!)

It makes my heart proud that you're a contrarian, just like me. :)

[Maureen]

And some days, putting yourself first means taking a day off from writing. I'm doing that today. Went to the movies and read the paper and just took a break...

Trust me, the state of my house shows that generally, the writing comes first. And some days, it's the writer! ;-)

[Donna Cummings]

Maureen, that is so true! The writer has to be taken care of, and too often that isn't high enough on the priority list. I hope you had fun with your day off. :)

[Kari Marie]

This is so true. No one else can write for us. OK, well we could hire a ghostwriter but what would be the fun in that? Unfortunately putting myself (and my writing) first means getting up at 5 a.m. I am sooo not a morning person. You know what? I LIKE it now. Who knew? Some days the dishes can just sit in the sink and the delivery boy is just 30 minutes away.

[Donna Cummings]

Kari Marie, I like your attitude! Not to mention your resolve. I'm not a morning person either, but if we want to make this a priority, this is what we have to do. :) Congrats to you for putting your writing first!

[julie gardner]

LOVE the word "knackered."

I will now be using it every day for the rest of the summer to describe myself.

SOOOO much better (high maintenance) than "tired" or even "exhausted."

Yes. Knackered sounds serious.
Like a thoroughbred.
A sleepy one.

XO

[Donna Cummings]

Julie -- "knackered" IS a great word. I think we can thank the Brits for that. So much more refined, and fun. I'm glad you'll get to use it this summer. :) Except for the fact that you'll be, well, knackered. LOL