We all respond differently to criticism. Our reaction may depend on our mood, or the alignment of the planets, or if a cute guy winked at us that morning at the local coffee shop.
Our work is going to be critiqued at some point, and, most likely, criticized. But worrying about potential criticism can paralyze our creativity. So how do we prepare for it without losing our ability to tell our stories?
A post by Tara Sophia Mohr, titled "A Few Things I've Learned About Playing Big", has some intriguing thoughts:
If we are afraid of criticism, it’s pretty hard to play big, since playing big means being revolutionary and that means invoking criticism.
Often the criticism we are most afraid of is what we already believe (deep down) about ourselves. When we change the beliefs we have about ourselves, criticism bounces off.
I write quirky stories, with kooky situations, and vibrant characters. On a good day of writing, with a high word count and time zipping by, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of my work. I know it's good.
But, on those days when I'm filled with doubts (as all writers are), it's easy to start picking apart every little thing that's wrong. Not in a "I can fix this later" way, but in a post-mortem fashion, i.e., "This never should have been allowed to see the light of day".
Delete, delete, delete.
Even worse is how creative our anticipation can be. We start to tremble at what others might say, envisioning them shredding our story like hyenas in a nature channel show. Instead of writing our books, we concoct an extensive outline of everything a potential reader could hate ("The most blatant overuse of 'the' this reader has EVER seen").
Before we know it, we're decimated. We've destroyed any hope of believing in our work, or our writerly skills. We seek a safe harbor, shelter from the critics, anything that will protect our words from harm.
We start thinking in smaller terms, seriously contemplating what will please the most people. Unfortunately we don't know what will please the most people. Nobody knows, not even a best-selling author, until after it's actually happened. Even then it's a guessing game as to why it succeeded.
We have to remember that it's not possible to pre-empt criticism. For every single person that loves a certain story element, there will be just as many that hate it.
So don't try to choose which crowd to please.
Write your story, the way it needs to be written, in the biggest, most outrageous way you can. Stretch yourself when you feel like shrinking. Open your mind to the hugest possibilities and embrace them like a long-lost amigo. Feel how much power you have in your stories and share all of that with the rest of us.
Your story could be the one that makes the haters say, "I don't usually read this kind of book, BUT. . .", right before they rhapsodize about how you rocked their world.
Criticism is not meant to dictate which ideas you share with the world. It is designed to respond to those ideas, and the stories you've made out of them.
When you think of criticism like that, there's really no reason to be afraid of it anymore.